Coping With Change
Coping With Change
This has been a year full of unexpected changes in our work, school, social, community and family lives. The upcoming holidays will also require new ways of celebrating with family and friends. Whether your holiday traditions are cherished or obligatory, changing how you celebrate can be disorienting.
Negative beliefs and unresolved trauma can affect how we respond to change — even changing our holiday traditions. I hope the article below will be helpful for navigating that stress. Our holidays may not look like what we expect, but they can still be meaningful and even happy. That’s certainly my wish for you this season.
“There is nothing permanent except change.”
Heraclitus
The world seems to be changing at an extraordinary pace. Just when we get used to the way things are, life shifts. The unexpected changes that 2020 has brought have changed our lives in ways we had not imagined. Change itself can be unsettling; even positive changes can throw our lives off balance.
As soon as something nudges us out of our regular routine, or challenges our understanding of how the world works and where we fit into it, we’re likely to experience a deluge of feelings. Fear, anxiety, overwhelm, excitement, distraction or denial are all normal responses to change.
Those feelings can also manifest in behavior. You may act out with aggressive or passive-aggressive communication. You may push yourself to overwork or take the opposite approach and procrastinate, avoiding responsibilities.
When we are in disequilibrium, self care can suffer. You may be more likely to reach for unhealthy substances or behaviors, get less sleep, or skip meals or exercise routines. Relationships can suffer if you cut yourself off from others or spend time with people who have unhealthy habits.
The Impact
Stress from both positive and negative change can have immediate and long-term effects. Stress inhibits digestion and absorption of nutrients, impairs your body’s ability to ward off germs, exacerbates insomnia and can worsen pre-existing health conditions. If you’re also engaging in unhealthy behaviors and poor self-care, you’re at an even higher risk for illness or injury.
Mental abilities can be affected, as well. When you’re preoccupied about the future, it’s much harder to concentrate and/or apply your brainpower to what’s in front of you.
Great leaders are admired for their serenity and confidence in the face of uncertainty. For most of us, uncertainty and change bring our emotions close to the surface where they can flare up at inopportune times. Whether you lash out, cry or pound on your desk, it’s uncomfortable to feel out of control.
Strategies for coping with change
Take care of your body. Eat well, sleep well, exercise to discharge stress and refrain from harmful habits, such as smoking, excessive drinking, or recreational drugs.
Take care of your mind. Stay in the present by practicing deep breathing, prayer and/or meditation. Challenge your negative thinking and keep things in perspective by focusing on the present and what you can control.
Express your emotions in healthy ways. Share your anxiety or frustration with people you trust. When negative emotions feel overwhelming, find positive ways to release them, such as going for a run or playing an instrument.
Treat others well. Strengthen your good relationships so you can draw on their support and work at your challenging relationships so they don’t add to your stress.
Be proactive. Prepare the best you can for the changes that might come, but then accept the reality of the moment. Think back to other challenges you’ve come through to remind yourself that things can turn out okay.
Into every life change will come, but its lasting impact doesn’t have to be harmful. Change also has a way of opening doors that lead to rewarding experiences and growth. If you can, let change be the catalyst for better self-care, which will help you be your best self at all times, whether stable or uncertain.
Author’s content used under license, © 2008 Claire Communications
Further Thoughts
Living in a prolonged state of flux can put a strain on our emotional health. If you find yourself feeling overwhelmed by the uncertainty of life or stuck in a cycle of negative responses, you might want to consider working with a therapist. These responses often stem from deep set beliefs that have an unwanted power over our behavior.
Past experiences of trauma or emotional wounds can impact how we respond to the things that unsettle us in our lives. EMDR is a therapy we use at Simmeth Counseling that helps our clients process and release the power of negative beliefs associated with trauma and other emotional distress.
If you’d like to talk about how we can help you, please call our office at 818-681-6627 for a free, 15-minute consultation. We offer both in-person and video conferencing sessions. For those who are comfortable with coming to the office, and do not have other compromising health issues, we’ve instituted protocols for cleaning and scheduling.
